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International Coalition for British Reparations: People of the World, it's Time to get Paid.

British Men Urged To Be Manlier

11.03.2008 - Austerity style: Men of Britain, put down your hair gel

It appears that we're not the only ones who've noticed British men eschewing hard labor in favor of tea parties. With the economic meltdown affecting our everyday lives, at least one British man has noticed that decades hoity-toity attitude has robbed him of the ability to hammer a nail to a wall. This troubling realization has led him to call for all British men to put their hair gel down and pick up a shovel. Judging from history, we don't think anyone will listen. For centuries, British men have outsourced all manual labor, thus causing self-sufficiency to go by the wayside. So when a toilet gets clogged in England, men pick up a phone, not a plunger.

Does it not trouble you, England, that your men have to be told that the word "product" is something you manufacture, rather than something you put on your hair? Or that "The Hardware Store Is The New Spa" might serve as a rallying cry? All jokes aside, isn't it alarming that your men have to be told to stop acting like women? Good luck, England, if you want to learn how to act like real men, you know where to find us.

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