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International Coalition for British Reparations: People of the World, it's Time to get Paid.

British Mole Man Ordered to Cease and Desist Tunnel Digging

04.17.2008

75-year-old William Lytlle of Kackney has been told he must stop his underground excavation project immediately. For over forty years, the engineer has been digging an elaborate maze of tunnels under his dilapidated Victorian home. The tunnel system radiates 20 m in every direction from his property, and sits just above the water table at about 8 m. A variety of stuff ranging from boats and automobiles to kitchen appliances is stored in Lyttle’s catacombs. Nearby residents and city officials are worried that the tunnel system compromises the integrity of surrounding buildings and infrastructure, and have ordered the tunnels to be filled with concrete at a cost of 1,000,000 pounds.

Wow, William, you are one crazy old codger. We appreciate your unique breed of eccentricity, but we can’t figure out why it took 40 years for your government to take action against you, despite the fact that your neighbors have been complaining about your digging since the late seventies. Perhaps this is just another example of British incompetence? Hope you get your kitchen appliances back!

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